It was 81 degrees (F) today! It was so beautiful. We went up to Courtney's house (my midwife) and played outside with her family for an hour or so. She listened to Dawson's lungs and she said he didn't sound like he was getting enough oxygen at that point but he did seem to breath better later on. I was told told to up his echinacea and vitamin C. The cough seems to be getting a bit better though.

We won $50 of groceries at the local grocery salvage~WOO HOO! We needed it this week.

1. What's your favorite animal? Bears

2. What pets have you had in your lifetime? several cats. Koko we raised from a kitten and he died at the old age of 18. Right now Nanuk who is a malamute/Husky (12) lives with my parents. I have Keegan my chocolate lab who is 3 and Max who is an Aussie Shepherd/mut mix who is almost 3. Champ our cat is 5. When I was in jr. high I had mice. I owned a bunny once. Bad mistake.

3. Is there any specific pet that you've wanted but never had? Why? not that I can think of.

4. Are you allergic to any animals? long haired cats a little bit

5. Do you have any 'pet' pet peeves (your pets or others')? My parents have a cat and my brothers dog (spam) in the house. They only get up fur once a week if that. My kids go over there and end up with fur all over their clothes and face because the fur is on everything!

AAAAAHHHHH! I am freeing myself of mess and clutter. I am finding homes for all the useless shit around my house (mostly the trash) and I'm making things easier for Megan to play with and utilizing the spare bedroom for her to play in so that everything doesn't have to be all over my living room. I just moved a bookshelf from my garage and loaded it with the books I bought last week. A daycare went out of business and I bought 2 big boxes of books for $10 total. I put my old boombox on top and put Megan's tapes and CD's on the top shelf. I moved out an unused chest (Josh's old toybox that really needs to be fixed up badly) and the round table that I had put in there when Megan was a baby next to the glider. In a bit I am going to unload the old server that was in my parents house years ago and I am going to put Megan's play kitchen in the kitchen so she has something to do while I am cooking or cleaning. Yes, I do let her help me in there but I shudder at the thought of her helping out with more than a few mixes here and some rinsing dishes there. I also ran a load of dishes and a load of towels and am just stopping to eat my ravioli (from a can-ICK! I don't have time to cook when I'm on a roll. lol)

Larissa I just may have one up on you. ROFL! :P

Oh, I told my daddy (staunch Republican) today that I was joining the Libertarian party. For some reason, he has the idea that it is full of pro-abortion druggies. Not the case, but anyway, I gave him the vaccination and midwife examples. He still can't grasp why I specifically would not hire a govt. certified midwife to attend my home birth. He thinks that Courtney, my midwife, should just go get certified and be legal. NO!!! She would never do that and thats what i like about her! I suppose he is just too old and set in his ways to understand or change and that is fine. He did think it was amusing that my brother and I at least have that in common with each other. I do too frankly but for other reasons.

This morning I went over to a church friend's house. Her little girl is only 3 months older than Mimi but is already in 4T so I got some nice clothes to finish this winter (she has almost outgrown everything), for this summer and for next year too. She sold everything for a dollar an item which I though was pretty reasonable. Some things weren't that great, but others were really nice so I think it balanced out.

My daddy came over today and wants us all to get together and talk everything out. That is fine with me. But, I told him I had nothing to say to my brother until he appoligized for acting like a jerk. Plain and simple. I don't want to hear any excuses or how it was anyones fault but his own. If I hear any blame on anyone or anything come out of his mouth I'm through. I also won't do it without Josh being there becuase while I know he believes me, I want him to be around in case T opens his mouth and says something snappy or assholeish. It will also keep my temper in check. I also want to ask him flat out if he is using drugs because his behavior over the past 2 months is very much like it was when we knew he was using drugs. At the end of last year and until the end of this past Jan, he was a different person. He was going to church, started a Bible study and was a decent person to be around. We rarely argued, and when we did, it never got that heated. All of a sudden hes hanging around this old friend of his and he changed. Everyone I have discussed this with has asked me if hes using and Josh and I had already discussed it ourselves. My sister thinks he is too. He won't change though until my parents make him. Mom is an enabler and my daddy is totally permissive. My older brother stayed home off and on until he was past 30. I see the same thing coming for T.

Last night was weird. To start with, I went to bed with a headache and left the kids up with Josh. It was 9 at that point and Dawson was NOT going to go to sleep. So, at 10 he was still awake but pissed at that point and I had even gotten up at 9:30 to try and nurse him down for the night. He wasn't having it and I felt bad too. Well, he cried and screamed and it turned out I think that he was too hot in his sleeper and blanket. I wish I had figured it out sooner. Anyway, after I came to my senses, he went on to sleep and then I got Megan in her bed and went back to bed myself. Sometime in the night, I woke up and Dawson was screaming so I got up quickly and took him to the living room and turned on the soothing CD and laid on the couch with him. A bit later, I woke up (I thought) and had Megan on me (or I thought I did anyway). Well, I told her that I needed to take care of Dawson and put her down. I believe at that point that he might have been crying but I looked for him and he was on the floor. Did I put my baby in the floor thinking he was Megan??? (if I had I would have basically dropped him once his feet were down because I was assuming it was Megan and she would walk off) I swear I remember it being Megan but none of it makes sense to me. I actually accused Josh of bringing Megan to me and putting Dawson in the floor. I don't know what really happened and suppose I never will know. Whatever happened was weird, I'll tell ya that!

My poor baby. He is sick. Has a bad cough and his sinuses are draining down his throat it seems. :( I got some homeopathics and some eucalyptus rub this morning. He seems to be on a nursing strike as well except that he will nurse after hes started to drift off to sleep. Its so frustrating. He will curl up and nuzzle like he is ready to eat (and its been like 3 hours so I know he must be hungry) but as soon as it gets near his mouth he throws his head back and screams. :( My mommy instict told me to go lay down with him a few min ago so I did and it bothered him. I should have listened to the daddy instinct...the one that says "hes sleeping, just leave him alone." I wanted to curl up next to my baby.

Yesterday I spent the morning returning some merchandise in Hickory and then I took the kids to the Dollar Tree for some Easter basket goodies. I did this all by myself and was feeling good about how well it went since I usually take my mom with me if I'm going more than 1 place just to help with Megan. Anyway, it was getting near lunchtime so I went through Wendy's for some nuggets and fries and then decided to go to my parents house which is closer to Hickory than mine is to let the kids rest and then see their grandparents. No one was there but my brother when I got there but I knew my mom would be home shortly from her meeting. Megan fell asleep in the car so I took Dawson in. He was having a hard time getting comfortable there and it took me quite a bit to get him calmed back down. I know my brother heard this because Dawson screamed for a while. I had to get him asleep with his paci and then pop it out so he could nurse. When I got him laid down on the couch, I got Megan out of the car and carefully carried her up the steps to my parents bed. T came in and says (and remember, M is sleeping but stirring a bit so I'm nursing her)"Oh a message." I asked him not to play the answering machine and he says "Well, I want to know if its for me." so he does it anyway. Then he goes down the steps, slams 2 downstairs doors and wakes up Dawson. I removed myself from Megan and ran down the steps to comfort Dawson who is wide awake by that time. T comes in the room and says loudly "Oh is my nephew awake" to which I told him to get out of the room because he needs to sleep! He yells at me to get out of *his* house (he is 23 and living in my parents house rent free and working no more than 3-4 hours a day delivering pizza so he can keep his car), that no one wants me there and I should go home. Megan at this point is coming down the steps crying so I grabbed her up and we left. My mom pulled in the driveway as I was getting M bucked up and asked what was wrong. I told her the 10 second version and almost ran her down to get out of the driveway. I was shaking. I called and told my dad the full story when I had calmed down a bit but I used the F word and he told me to watch my mouth...LOL, Yes daddy! But I also told him that we would not be visiting them in their house anymore. If they want to see the kids, they have to come here as long as T lives there. I have said it before but always decided I needed to give it another chance for the kids sake. This time I am through because I dont' want my kids around him. He has no respect for anyone or anything and doesn't think about anyone but himself. So, neither kid got naps yesterday so it ended up being a crappy afternoon.

What Pattern Are You?

Refined Classic and Modest...even though I said my favorite curse word was "fuck" ROFL!

I also took the how British are you at Tanya's Since I couldn't figure out how to copy/paste it, I'll just have you know that I am 25% British like Gwyneth Paltrow. I can fake a pretty good accent, but don't ask me what any of it means. :P

To Do:
Clean out bedroom closet
Clean out Blazer
Get yardsale stuff out of house
Put keep stuff in the attic
Plant seeds
Finish turquois pj pants
Tinker with turquois dress